Letters of Life

The Fine Art of Blogging

So I’m reading in today’s Urban, ST’s fashion weekly–the equivalent of the Today paper in the local fashion scene–about these kawaii girlbloggers who get a zillion hits a day and get ad revenue because adolescents and NSFs love gawking at these cutsey pictures posted on their blogs. Ok, I don’t know the exact demographics of their readers, but just going by the content of the blogs (I am using the word content loosely here), a good grasp of grammar and harbouring a disdain for the frivolous would seriously handicap your chances of posting, say, 3000 hits.

The proof is in the numbers: 5, 984 Facebook fans can’t be wrong. Afterall, you can’t beat an update like “My lipgloss so sticky. . . ” for its axiomatic and aphoristic qualities. Man, I need to learn to write like that. Nobody’s interested in flowery–make that willowy–prose on lash extensions when they can see cutesy-wutesy pictures of the exact same thing on kittens.

Ok, I get it. Everyone loves looking at nubile eye candy, so these babes give what the masses want. To be fair, their blogs have got a lot going on, which is what the iGeneration craves: Links to Twitter, Facebook, an automatic playlist of favourite songs (I want I want), cute pandas and online games, you name it.

It helps to have a crazy lifestyle as depicted in the blogs: School in the daytime, meals with like-minded girlfriends decked out in eye-popping clothes, followed by partying and hard-drinking when the sun goes down until it rises again, decked out in clubbing clothes that elicit all kinds of comments from said NSFs. I’m assuming they are NSFs or similar from the level of discourse posted on the Comments pages.

Ice Ice Baby

This is where I went tonight, a big dinner-and-dance by a listed local company. It’s D&D budget is the GDP of a small island somewhere in the South Pacific because 1) the lucky draw prizes run into a few thousand dollars for the top prizes each, 2) Kit Chan sang two numbers and TONI BRAXTON

Remember Unbreak My Heart?

sang at least six numbers, 3) they had that ice bar…literally the coolest thing in the ballroom lobby, and 4) Drum roll please….my goody bag had cash vouchers to eat from their stable of fine-dining restaurants totalling….second drum roll please, with a black cherry on top…$500. ‘Course I wasn’t alone–Andre was my accessory–so we have….third drum roll please with a vanilla pod on it…$1000.00 of cash vouchers to splurge on Italian, Japanese kaiseki, Fuchow cuisine, and Argentinian steak at our disposal.

Now, if only I knew how to blog.

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